From dealing with ex-husband Eric Benet’s sex addiction to a current custody battle with baby daddy, Gabriel Aubry, we’ve seen Halle Berry go through many ups and downs with her former flames. And it leads us to beg the question: Could Halle be choosing the wrong men? When you first meet someone, you usually can’t determine their potential flaws immediately. And what one person might consider a deal breaker, you might be able to live with. So how do you find the right partner for YOU? Here are a few key things you should consider before choosing a Mr. or Mrs. Right.
1. Determine your 80/20 – If you’ve seen Tyler Perry’s Why Did I Get Married?, then you’re probably familiar with the 80/20 rule as it applies to dating. If you haven’t seen the movie, the 80/20 rule in dating refers to the fact that you should ideally look for someone that has 80% of what you’re looking for and be willing to negotiate on the other 20%. So which qualities are essential in a mate, and which ones are desired but not actually required? Make a list of what you’re looking for in a potential mate. If there are 10 things you want, you should be willing to budge on at least two of them.
2. Don’t rush into anything – Love at first sight is possible, but be cautious about rushing into a relationship, and certainly a marriage. Are you familiar with his or her background? Have you met his or her friends and family? Have you asked all of the important questions? If you fall for someone quickly, you want to ensure that you don’t fall short of finding out everything you need to know before deciding to pursue something with him or her. Also, you want to ensure that you’re actually ready to move to the next level.
3. Watch the way he/she treats others – When you are deciding whether someone would make a good mate, pay close attention to his or her relationship and interactions with family members, close friends or even strangers. It’ll certainly give you a good picture of how he or she will probably treat you and those you care about most.
4. Don’t expect him or her to change – Once you’ve really gotten to know someone, that is when you have to decide if you are willing to accept him or her, flaws and all. If she doesn’t like to cook, she might compromise at times but she probably won’t suddenly love to make dinner for you. And he probably will still have to pull late nights at the office once you become a part of the picture. If you are hoping to change a thing or two about your new love interest, you might want to think again.
5. Trust your gut – Whether you have a very strong intuition that he’s cheating, or if you just can’t seem to shake something she said or did, don’t ignore your feelings. Sometimes, your gut may be the only thing that could save you from a potentially volatile relationship.
—— By: Crystal Tate