Relationships: When Did Disappointment Become The Expectation?

You: Baby, what’s wrong?
Me: Nothing. I don’t feel like talking about it.
You: But if it’s nothing how can it even be something to talk about?
Me: ….
You: Call me when you’re ready to talk about it
::Click::

Call you when I’m ready? What if I’ll never be ready or willing to talk about it with you? Do I just never call you back or hear from you again? The truth is that it is nothing. Nothing that concerns you and everything to do with me. Personally. Solely. Just me. It has everything to do with how I think and how simple little things I should look forward to have become meaningless in the fight you are trying to wage with my mental.

You see, my mental is merely waiting. Waiting for the next time you fuck up. And waiting for the next big fight. Waiting for another reason as to why you can’t do this or can’t do that. Waiting for your #epicfail so I can raise my defenses one more gain and take cover in the inner recesses of the coldest places of my heart. A place too cold that many can’t withstand for too long and wonder why or how. How could I possibly be this way and why do I prefer this place to the warmer, more practical locations I used to frequent when I was much much younger and way less tainted. Tainted, yes, even by you.

::Ring Ring::
Me: Hello?
You: I wasn’t expecting an answer, care to talk?
Me: Nah, I’m busy. I’ll call in a bit.
::Click::

You weren’t expecting an answer and I wasn’t expecting a phone call. Funny, because despite the proof that you care and that you’re thinking. About. Me. Maybe, even only me. I still doubt. It. Everything. You. Us. We. Can this even be? Can you be the mysterious he that I was told would come along some day and change my perception of reality? A reality that once was filled with…nothing….but. Nothing happy, yet nothing all too sad? I don’t understand because I expected you then but instead. Nothing. And now you wish to be. Everything?

This just won’t do. I can’t blame you for my past. But. What was done in the past has not disappeared. And like you wish the past were to me, you sir, were not. There. Until now. But. Now is too late. As now my expectation went from a level TEN. SEVEN. FOUR. TWO. To None. To NEGATIVE You. Back To ZERO, still NO hero. Now it’s just at sheer disappointment. As my expectation for all things good. All things romantic. All thing YOU and all things Me. We. Us. Everything. Has turned to dust and transformed into sheer but very there DISAPPOINTMENT.

Not the best attempt, but a first attempt at something I just don’t do. Let me know your thoughts. Be brutal. Be honest. Be you as I do this just for…

About Carla Clunis
You can find more of Carla’s musings on love and relationships at www.theheartmalfunctions.com where she blogs about the ups and downs of dating and relating.
—— By: Carla Clunis

We all want to experience a fulfilling, loving relationship with someone special. But why is it that so often we find ourselves in relationships filled with disappointment and pain? We’ve been conditioned to expect the worst from one another and our expectations play an integral role in how we relate to each other. This article explores the question: when did disappointment become the expectation for relationships?

The nature of human connection has changed over time, as people have become more isolated from one another and communication has shifted towards digital mediums. In this era of social media and instant gratification, it can be easy to take relationships for granted or forget that they require effort in order to thrive. Unfortunately, many of us are left feeling let down after investing our hearts into something only to realize that what we expected was unrealistic.

By understanding where these expectations come from and looking at successful examples of healthy relationships, we can learn how to cultivate healthier ones within ourselves. It’s time for us to re-evaluate our beliefs around love, attachment, and communication in order to build meaningful connections without having our hopes crushed by unmet expectations. So let’s dive into the topic of ‘Relationships: When Did Disappointment Become The Expectation?’

Causes Of Disappointment In Relationships

Disappointment in relationships can be caused by a variety of factors. It’s important to recognize the underlying causes, so that you can address them and build stronger connections with your loved ones.

The first cause is unrealistic expectations. When someone expects something from their partner or friend that they cannot realistically provide – either due to lack of resources, emotional capacity, or time constraints – they are setting themselves up for disappointment. People often enter relationships without discussing what each person needs and wants out of it, which leads to frustration when those expectations aren’t met.

Another factor is miscommunication. In healthy interactions, both people should feel heard and understood by one another. However, if partners are not speaking openly about how they feel or being honest about their true motives and intentions, then misunderstandings may arise between them. This can lead to hurt feelings as well as resentment on both sides because neither person gets what they want out of the relationship.

Finally, unresolved issues from past experiences could also lead to disappointment in current relationships. If there has been trauma or abuse in a person’s life, it might be difficult for them to trust again and open up completely to others; this could result in constant tension between friends or partners who don’t understand why the other person isn’t responding positively towards them. Additionally, unresolved childhood wounds such as abandonment and neglect could make someone more prone to feeling unfulfilled in any kind of interpersonal bond they have.

Recognizing these potential sources of dissatisfaction will help create healthier bonds between individuals going forward. By understanding our own triggers and learning better communication strategies we can start taking steps towards building meaningful connections with those around us.

Strategies For Overcoming Disappointment

Despite disappointment being a common emotion in relationships, there are still ways to overcome it. Here are some strategies that can help build stronger connections and reduce feelings of frustration or resentment:

Firstly, try to be more honest and open with each other. Expressing how you really feel about certain situations will allow your partner or friend to better understand what is going on inside your head. It may also uncover any underlying issues causing the tension between the two of you, so they can be addressed directly. Additionally, if expectations aren’t met, discuss why this happened before jumping to conclusions – communication is key when it comes to resolving conflicts.

Secondly, work on developing self-awareness and understanding your own triggers for feeling disappointed. Reflect on past experiences and recognize which patterns might have caused these emotions in prior interactions as well. When we become aware of our own emotional state, we’re able to better manage these feelings when they arise instead of letting them take control over us. This will enable us to stay present during conversations with our loved ones rather than getting caught up in the moment and reacting negatively.

Finally, make sure both people set realistic goals for their relationship and communicate regularly about their needs and wants from one another; setting boundaries early on in the connection can ensure everyone’s expectations are clear right away. Both parties should also strive to show kindness towards each other even when disagreements do occur – doing small acts of service like offering support or listening attentively goes a long way in reinforcing trust within a relationship.

Conclusion

The expectation of disappointment in relationships is an issue that needs to be addressed. It’s important to look at the underlying causes, so we can understand why it happens and how to start overcoming it. We need to remember that no relationship is perfect – each one brings its own unique challenges and requires a lot of effort from both partners. But by being open with our expectations, communicating openly, and having patience for ourselves as well as our partner, we can work through difficult times together and create a fulfilling relationship. Ultimately, if you want something different than what you’ve been experiencing up until now, then it starts with you. You can decide to change your perspective on relationships and move away from expecting disappointment towards embracing connection and joy.