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Petition Demands National Anthem Be Changed to R. Kelly's 'Ignition (Remix)'?

Elle Breezy Wed, Mar 06, 2013
Petition Demands National Anthem Be Changed to R. Kelly's 'Ignition (Remix)'?

Surely, this MUST be all in good humor.

I mean, yes, the nation is MUCH different than what it was in 1814 when Francis Scott Key wrote The Star Spangled Banner, but to the point of honoring the nation with odes to “sippin on coke and rum,” and “the feakin’ weekend?

On the White House administration’s website, a petition has been filed to make R. Kelly’s ten-year-old party anthem “Ignition (Remix)” our nation's new National Anthem. So far, the petition has 4,937 of the 100,000 signatures needed by April 2nd, at which that time the White House is required to respond. Usually, The Executive Branch replies to outrageous requests, while not taking them seriously.

Here's the full text of the "Ignition (Remix)" petition:

    ”WE PETITION THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION TO: change the national anthem to R. Kelly's 2003 hit "Ignition (Remix)."

We, the undersigned, would like the Obama administration to recognize the need for a new national anthem, one that even a decade after its creation, is still hot and fresh out the kitchen. America has changed since Francis Scott Key penned our current anthem in 1814. Since then, we have realized that after the show, it's the afterparty, and that after the party, it's the hotel lobby, and--perhaps most importantly--that 'round about four, you've got to clear the lobby, at which point it's strongly recommended that you take it to the room and freak somebody. President Obama: we ask you to recognize the evolution of this beautiful country and give us an anthem that better suits the glorious nation we have become.”

This isn’t the first time crazy petitions have been put on the President’s desk; a petition to make unlocking cell phones legal was responded to by an official, and a request for the government to commission a Death Star was turned down because of “fiscal impracticality.”

Only time will tell if the White House will respond. It’ll be interesting to see how they address this one!

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