Since the death of her brother Michael Jackson in June 2009, pop star Janet Jackson has been pushing and forcing” herself to mourn his tragic passing but she admits recently that she suppressed her emotions so she could deal.
Holding back her grief, Janet tells the “Today” show, which will air on Friday, February 11, that she is now on the road to accepting her brother’s death and healing her broken heart.
“I was finally able to (start grieving). I was in Paris and it was one of those moments,â Jackson says. âAt some point, you have to move on and I’m trying to do that and it (is) really difficult. There’s still not a day that goes by where I don’t think about him. Not one day, not one day.”
“I’m kind of pushing myself, forcing myself to a certain degree to get over this because it’s not the healthiest. I just spent the night (in Paris) watching all his videos and listening to his music. There were moments when I cried and moments that made me laugh. It was good for me; I needed it.”
“I guess out of everyone in my family, I never had that moment to cry about his death. I don’t know if it was trying to shield the pain, or just trying to hold it all together because I saw that everyone else around me was falling apart. (I) never (took) that moment to grieve, really grieve, even at the surface. For now, yeah, I did (grieve). A year had passed and I hadn’t.”
Michael Jackson died after suffering a cardiac arrest brought on by an overdose of anaesthetic Propofol in June 2009.